Queen Lundqvist sucks at the Mellon, so the Rags went with 6 foot 6 inch giant goalie Stephen Valiquette. And it was free Hat Night. Bing made the most of these two situations.
-Tanger, Goggles, and TK all return tonight. FINALLY.
-Eaton gets nabbed for a penalty 37 seconds in. Pens PK mops up.
-Douchebag Avery jobs Fleury, Pens get a PP. It looks sharp, but Death Valley shuts it down.
-Marc Staal takes a pass, blows by a rusty Goggles and buries a backhand past Flower. 1-0 Rags.
-Bing does some hard work behind the Rags net and gets it in front to Geno who buries it. 1-1. Crosby and Guerin get assists.
-Goggles hits the afterburners and takes on at least 3 Rags in the zone, they poke it free and Bing gets it just before it goes offsides. Bing then rips an Unreal wrist shot past Death Valley. 2-1 Pens. Sick shot by Bing. Sick. Goggles gets the only assist.
-Tanger gets a crisp pass to Superstar, who passes to Bing. Bing goes back to the Superstar and Mad Max goes forehand, backhand, and scores. First goal since last years Game 7 and it's a beaut. 3-1 Pens. Bing and Tanger get assists.
-Period ends with a scrum. Rupp is seen laughing at what a little woman Avery is.
-17 seconds in, Billy Gunn gets 2 minutes for hooking. Pens PK = money.
-Flower makes a big save on Drury and then Higgins looking for a rebound.
-Prospal gets a penalty. Pens PP does a decent job, but no dice.
-Rags pile in front of the net, Gilroy fires a long shot Flower probably never sees. 3-2.
-Del Zotto tries to job Billy Gunn and gets a penalty. Again, the Pens PP is shut down. Rags always have a pretty good PK.
-With time ticking down, Eaton flicks a shot at the net and it goes in with 0.00.02 left in the period. UNREAL. Adams and Free Candy get the assists. 4-2 Pens. It's a perfect setup for a wild third period.
-33 seconds in, Rags come out with fire and Rozsival slaps one past Fleury. 4-3.
-Death Valley does his best French Toast impression and tries to play a puck behind his net. The league leader in takeways, Malkimania jobs him and gets the puck. Geno tries to stuff it in but it slides out to Crosby. Bing flicks it off the back Death Valley and into the net. Way to keep your team in the game. 5-3, Geno gets the only assist.
-4 minutes later, Iceman finds himself alone on the right point with puck. he winds up and blows a slapper past Death Valley. 6-3 Pens. Free Candy and Sarge with the assists. That's 7 goals for Dupuis now.
-Cooke blasts Artem Anisimov with a shoulder check. He gets 2 minutes for interference. He left his feet, yes, but how many players have we seen do this and worse with no repercussion? At least Anisimov made it to his bench, under his own power, unlike some dudes who get nailed with cheap shots. I'm talking about you Leadership.
-Pens kill Cooke's penalty.
-Brashear jumps Cooke, even though a ref is between them, and starts firing punches over the ref at Cooke. Jokeshear gets a double-minor for roughing. Thanks for taking that stupid penalty to give your team absolutely no chance to get back in it.
-On that PP, Bing takes a pass from Goggles, fakes a slapper, moves in, and buries another sick slapper. That's an HT on hat night, so Highmark hats come raining out of the stands like a snowstorm. It's a glorious sight. And a glorious score. 7-3 Pens.
-Pens still have the second half of that PP to work with, so 25 seconds later Tanger TangBangs a shot that TK deflects in. 8-3 Pens.
-Callahan fights Matt Cooke to answer for his hit to Anisimov, as per the Code. They both get a few shots in and hug the rest out.
-With about 6 minutes left, Avery shows what a coward and douchebag he is by jumping Fedotenko from behind. What an Unreal joke. He gets 2 for instigating, 5 for fighting and a 10-minute misconduct and has to be shoved down the runway by a ref cause he's crying so badly. Pens get a 7 minute power play.
-"GO HOME RANG-ERS! GO-HOME RAN-GERS!"
-Fans chant Happy Birthday to Fleury. Unreal.
-Pens spend the rest of the game jobbing on the PP trying to set up Godard.
-End of the game, 8-3 final.
-Unreal night by Bing. 3 goals, 2 assists, +4. What a Captain.
-Geno chipped in a goal, assist, and +2.
-Great night for the returning kids. 2 assists for both Goggles and Tanger and a goal from TK. Goggles looked a little rusty at first, but was much better after the first period. Tanger was solid all night and TK was flying like old times.
-Pens other d-men chipped in too, Gonch and Free Candy with 2 assists and Eaton with a big goal.
-Even though he gave up 3, Flower was solid on his b-day. He made a couple big saves in the second to keep the Rags in check.
-How does Staal end up a -2? Talk about bad luck.
-At least he wasn't a -5 like some Del Zotto dude.
-Cooke has been suspended 2 games for the hit on Anisimov. You know what, I don't like it, but I'll accept it. But it sickens me that guys like Jokevechkin can do the same thing and get no repercussions. Leadership headshots a guy (who is still on his back) and gets nada. Hell, even Colby Armstrong has become a headhunter and gets away with. If you are gonna punish Cooke, the Kronwalls and Jokevechkins need to be punished too. And that Douchenozzle Avery absolutely needs to get suspended for jumping FedEx. If that doesn't happen, the NHL is making a solid case to become a joke.
-Rags are a Joke.
-Anyways, it's a great feeling feeling to blow out a rival. We hate the Flyers, Caps, and Red Wings so much, we forget that we have a solid rivalry with the Rags as well.
-Monday is gonna be interesting, to say the least.
-LET'S GO PENS!!!!
-the Blueline Bandit